Chains

I read a lot of books, I listen to a lot of music, I write a lot of stuff, and sing a lot. I've been blessed to be given beautiful prose and lyrics...to write a song or a poem, or hear/read something that speaks to me or my situation, or that of someone else. But it's rare that I share it...I keep it to myself, for all kinds of reasons. The writing is freeing, so I do it for me, and not other people, so I keep it. If I hear something profound, I keep it...for me. But I came to realize, this morning as I was on the train, that the blessing of composition whether it be words or sounds...has been given to me so that I might share it with someone that needs it.

Something happened in my life yesterday that was earth shattering, and has already proven to be life changing, for myself and many others. And there was something that was given to me a while ago, that if I'd shared it, may have given some hope in a seemingly hopeless situation. Have you ever heard a song, or read a poem that expressed exactly how you felt? A poem or a song can't fix a problem...but going through something and not having the ability to express it can be just as confining as the problem itself. This is what I would've shared...

Chains...that try to bind me
Chains...that won't let me go
Chains...they keep me from trying
Chains...please loose your strong hold
Chains...though I try to surrender
Chains...yet I still remember....
Whom the son sets free, is truly free indeed
Lord, please free me from these chains.

Chains...I'm a heart full of sorrow
Chains...I won't sleep well tonight because of these
Chains...How I long for tomorrow...
Because today, there are no tears left to cry...
Chains....Though it feels cold like winter
Chains...I will fight to remember...
That by your stripes, I'm healed....
To your heart, Lord, I appeal
Please free me from these chains...

of abuse
suicide
pain from my past,
that robs my peace of mind
chains of divorce
addiction and fear
being afraid to die
and afraid to live
chains of depression
(haven't laughed in a while)
restore my joy
and give me back my smile
I do love you, Jesus
(but not like I should)
I love you, Father
(but not like I could)
have mercy on me
I can't go on this way
save me, I'm lost
help me believe what you say
"This is just a test, though it's hard to see"
I surrender...you win
so now I ask you...

Please, free me from these chains....

I've decided that I'm going to share what's been given to me. Whether I'm given the words directly, or they come from someone else. Keeping with the thinking that everything happens for a reason, I don't believe that God gives me profound things to say for my benefit alone. Neither does he put me in the path to hear such things and not share them. So this is the first (well not the first, I kinda did this Tuesday too) of many entries that will very simply be me sharing words or art. I hope they serve a purpose in someone's life...

~MyMy
R.I.P Troy Vallenta